Looking Back at a Semester Abroad--Reflections

You may have guessed that I arrived safely in the states on December 23^rd and have been settling into my home life once more. As I finish unpacking my suitcases, I have also been unpacking all of the thoughts and feelings I collected over the course of this past semester. I don’t know how well I can place them before you all, but I will try to give a decent overview of my time in Korea now that I am home and looking back. Sorry if it is a bit long! Try to bear through it.

I will be honest, this journey started out rather inauspiciously. I was the awkward girl crying on the plane as it carried me closer and closer to some unknown adventure I was unprepared for. I was not sure if what I was headed toward would be worth leaving the familiarity of home for. But still, I had very high expectations for my semester. After all, I thought, I worked very hard to get to Korea. Therefore I had a lot of demands for what I wanted to get in return for my sacrifice of time and money.

As the fun of orientation passed and the realities of school life set in, I found myself increasingly discouraged and incredibly lonely. I was lost amid the torrent of new things—new people, new languages, new residence, new food, new school system, new teachers, etc. I had been overseas before but never so fully immersed in the unfamiliar. I was afraid I would be miserable the whole semester, even though there were many enjoyable times those first weeks.

I remember my first venture into the ocean right after orientation when a group of us took that long walk to the beach. I took off my shoes and stood close enough to the water that it would cover my feet. The water was cold and the waves violent as they pushed and pulled against the sand. I went in further, then a little further. Suddenly I was pulled off my feet and thrown under the water by one of the larger waves. I came up sputtering and shocked by the temperature and the roughness of the sand I was thrown against. But after a moment of recovery I could not keep myself from laughing.

Coming to Korea for me was like that wave. I was not expecting it to knock me over and pull me under, and at first it was a painful shock. But as time went on I was able to gain more stable footing. And when I was knocked down again, I had more confidence that I could come up laughing. I grew to be less lost and helpless, and I stopped demanding what I wanted from the semester and let it be what God wanted it to be for me. I slowly let go of my own expectations and let the experiences, lessons, and relationships happen more naturally.

As the weeks passed the language barriers began to seem less like fortress walls and more like beautiful little streams to cross. Dorm life seemed less like a prison and more like a family. Classes/academic life became less impossible and more challenging in the positive sense. Learning about the differences and similarities between cultures was less overwhelming and more and more exciting. I began to grasp the concept of unity in diversity—beauty in unfamiliarity.

But none of this growth happened out of my own ability. It came only through the grace that was shown to me by the people I met and the overwhelming presence of God I encountered. With the help of people much wiser than myself I learned contentment in loneliness. And after giving up my expectations for what I thought my semester abroad would be, suddenly it began exceeding even my highest hopes. For instance, I really desired my semester to be about other people, not myself, especially because as an American student I was the minority. But at first I was so lost and so confused that I felt I could not possibly help another soul. It’s difficult to aid a drowning person when your own lungs are full of water.

But I learned that maybe this is where the heart of a servant is born—when you recognize that you don’t have the answers, you are not above anyone, and actually need their help. Humility is a necessary trait in someone who helps others. How can you wash someone’s feet if you insist on standing upon a chair and raising yourself above them?

So many people, staff and students, modeled this behavior to me. I was amazed at how gracefully they accepted my presence amongst them despite how different our backgrounds were. We were all from vastly different belief systems, histories, cultures, families, and mindsets. You know, we are all made up of hundreds of stories just like a tapestry consists of hundreds of threads. And our lives, and all of the stories in our lives, are part of a much greater story.

As I discovered, it is important to let people into our stories. We should let the people around us become threads in our tapestry. We should learn from them, be open to them—not be afraid, even if it means a hard goodbye or a measure of pain. Let them challenge our preconceived notions of how the world works. It is good to be prudent, but I don’t want to limit the potential beauty of the story God is telling with my life. Relationships are part of that beauty, and were the most outstanding part of my semester. I am now honoured to have brothers and sisters from all over the world. Funny, the world is much bigger than I thought—but at the same time so much more tightly knit.

A clever man once said:

“Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime.” ~ Mark Twain

How true it is! There is something to be learned from every single person you meet on this earth.

As my semester began drawing to a close I wanted to drag my feet and slow time down. I feel like I found a special home at Handong. Even on the lonelier days or in the midst of school stress I was so at peace with the life I found there. I was even content with my classes and the difficult Korean education system. By the grace and kindness of my friends I developed really uplifting relationships with so many incredible people. I love each of them so much. I did not want to leave… I wanted to soak in those waves as long as I could.

Being in that kind of situation really teaches one to make the most of the given amount of time. It also taught me a lot about finding meaning where it was previously unlooked for. A paraphrase of my philosophy class is helpful at this juncture:

“It is arrogant to believe that tomorrow is everything, and that today has nothing and lacks all meaning. Today has meaning even if tomorrow does not exist. It is important to have goals because they give meaning to the future—but they also give meaning to the present moment. Work hard, but know why you are working hard. We must never be mindless, but always be mindful.”

I learned that grasping the meaning and purpose God has for any given season of life helps prevent abusing the gifts He gives us. Gifts of time, relationships, opportunities, etc. I had to be careful not to try and assign my own meaning to my time, because when I did, I suddenly felt dead in the water again. God is the author of meaning and He is the root of all meaning and purpose. At least, this is what I have found personally true.

Being a foreigner in a culture very different from your own also teaches you respect. Even if you don’t like aspects of that culture, when you have to live with it you learn to find the goodness and the value therein. I loved a lot about Korea—the food, the landscape, the history, the focus on community instead of the individual… But then I didn’t like other aspects such as the age hierarchy or how sometimes there was little privacy. It was very good to learn how to live within that new framework, and I hope to learn more someday. There is still so much to Korea that I have yet to learn.

Summing up the life lessons I learned in the span of even those four short months is a difficult business. I could tell so many stories and ramble on for pages and pages. But I won’t, for your sake as well as my own. If you find me in person or online, feel free to dig in deeper if you so desire.

Everything I learned, I learned with the help of other people—no matter what the nature of that knowledge was. Every single person I met taught me something whether it was cultural, practical, spiritual, or otherwise.

My roommates, among many other things, taught me better how to live in community. My professors taught me not only academics, but how to connect classroom learning with real life. My church family taught me about grace and servitude. And all my beautiful friends taught me more about who Christ is with their actions, their words, and their generosity. They taught me how to love and how to be loved, especially in regard to our Creator.

I learned other things as well. Like existing for a semester on instant or canned coffee, although not preferable, is still possible. Or, that one should never take for granted the simple blessing it is to be able to do laundry for free when you live with your parents. Also, you would be amazed at how much hair can be found in a room shared by four girls! And actually, corn and potato as pizza toppings are pretty good. Living without a cell phone is quite doable, Koreans are very conscientious about brushing their teeth, and there are almost no trash cans in their country. Many things could be added to this list.

~~~

Now that I am home I really miss Handong. I learned a lot as a student, but this semester really was a very special time for me to grow and change as a person. I sincerely hope that I can take what I learned and apply it to my life in America and that those lessons I learned will only expand. I also hope to one day make it back to Korea and to be able to visit all of my friends in their home countries across the globe. After learning about these cultures all semester I really want to experience them all face to face!

I have been so blessed to get to study abroad. Even though saying goodbye was difficult, I wouldn’t trade a single experience I had for anything, even the painful moments. I would encourage anyone I know to travel as much as possible, and to make the most of every moment. As our walls and expectations are torn down and we are connected to more and more people, life grows more and more beautiful I think. Not all lessons can be learned in a classroom—sometimes you just have to take the risk and step out onto the open road and let it take you where God wills it.

I cannot promise that next time I go somewhere and do something new I won’t be overwhelmed again. I still have a lot to learn, after all. But I do hope that next time when the ocean knocks me off my feet, I can remember what it feels like to come up laughing.

Thank you all for keeping up with my blog! I wish I could give a more detailed, rich account of my adventures abroad—but it would simply take too long, and my Spring school semester is about to start up which leaves me lacking time.

I pray God blesses you all with your own adventures and your own opportunities to travel and grow. Godspeed!

~ Mercy

멀ㅅ시

“And so my prayer is that your story will have involved some leaving and some coming home, some summer and some winter, some roses blooming out like children in a play. My hope is your story will be about changing, about getting something beautiful born inside of you… about moving yourself around water, around mountains, around friends, about learning to love others more than we love ourselves… We get one story, you and I, and one story alone. God has established the elements, the setting and the climax and the resolution. It would be a crime not to venture out, wouldn't it? It might be time for you to go. It might be time to change, to shine out.

I want to repeat one word for you:

Leave.

Roll the word around on your tongue for a bit. It is a beautiful word, isn't it? So strong and forceful, the way you have always wanted to be. And you will not be alone. You have never been alone. Don't worry. Everything will still be here when you get back. It is you who will have changed.” ~ Through Painted Desserts, by Don Miller 

Finals Week/Final Week

Thought I’d give a quick update about how my finals week went. Because of the nature of my class schedule, I ended up with a kind of strange finals week. I had one final on Monday night, and then the other four on Tuesday. Because they were so clustered it meant I had to study for all of them at once, and I couldn’t really spread it out.

I started studying about a week and a half in advance—some subjects a bit earlier, some a bit later. But when you only have two tests per semester, you have to cover a lot of ground each time. But before I got too deeply involved in finals, on Thursday I did get to go watch the school’s performance of Les Misérables. It was a really good, especially for a college group singing in their second language. It was really beautiful even though waiting in the cold outside for it to start was a bit taxing.

 The Friday before finals I camped out at the library until 3 a.m. Then I came back to the dorm to keep going until 6 a.m. Not my finest hours, I assure you. But don’t worry, I had some pickled radishes to help me through the studying.

That Saturday we had a farewell lunch with some of our wonderful Korean friends who helped all the new internationals out at orientation. Not all of us internationals and not all of the Korean helpers could make it, but it was really good to spend time with them again. This semester seems to have lasted forever, and yet at the same time it seems like just yesterday we arrived at Handong wide-eyed and clueless. This is the conundrum of time I guess.

I spent the rest of the day procrastinating and then eventually buckling down to study again. That evening I went to buy a few ingredients, then headed out to the faculty apartments with two lovely Chinese friends to do some baking. I ended up acquiring several baking mixes over the semester that needed to be used up, and the faculty family I work for told me I could use their oven when they were out of town that weekend.

We had a great evening baking and then sharing with others. But after we were finished it was back to the grind stone. I only lasted until 5 a.m. Saturday night, but was thankful to make it to church the next morning for my last service here. I really have come to love my church family here, and I will really miss them. What a beautiful church with beautiful people! And the worship was just what I needed for refreshment.

As you can imagine, more studying followed. I met up with two classmates for a study session and we ended up being able to take a car out into the city to find a quiet café with late night hours. We found a nice coffee shop by the ocean. It was actually a very productive evening for me, despite the repetitive Christmas music playing and the inebriated wanderers who strayed in later in the night. We stayed out until almost 3 then headed back. I got about seven hours of sleep this time which was greatly needed.

Monday night I took care of my Korean 1 final which may or may not have a good result. Then I pulled my final grueling night at the library. Tuesday came and found me taking more tests in one day than I ever have before. I feel slightly discouraged about at least two of the tests, but at least I can say they are over and I survived a very long day. Tuesday night I was able to have a really good time relaxing with a lot of good friends and good conversations—a blessed end to a very stressful finals week.

Since then I have been packing, taking care of random things, and spending time with friends as much as possible. I am not looking forward to the long trip home, but I trust God will get me through it somehow. Prayers would be appreciated! More posts to come soon.

End of the Semester Celebration

December 6^th was the evening of the I-House end of semester party. This happens every semester, apparently. I-House rents out a fancy wedding hall and everyone dresses nicely and spends an evening off campus together eating good food, enjoying performances from each other, and having general fellowship.

I was a little distraught that it was on a Friday—the same busy Friday that I had to give two presentations, but somehow I managed to pull off my classes smoothly and still have time to get ready with the help of my lovely roommates.

I was late to get on the bus so I was one of the people who got to stand for the trip, which was fine except for being in unstable shoes with heels. The wedding hall was really fancy; at least in my small town girl estimation. I felt out of place stepping onto the polished floors, but the smiles and greetings of my friends put me at my ease.

After everyone found their seats we had a time of worship, prayer, and introductory comments. We watched a video that one of the guys put together all about the happenings in the I-House community this semester. There was a lot of laughter and good conversation. About what you would expect from a tightly knit community in the mood to celebrate.

We moved onto the feasting portion of the evening with some really good food from the buffet. Definitely beat cafeteria food!

Once people were just about done eating a series of performances began where some of the students did something for the rest of us to enjoy. There was singing, dancing, and even a little magic show. As usual, it was a good time and I really enjoyed it. I may be biased, but I think that there are a lot of very talented people here at Handong.

Towards the end of the event they called everyone up to the front who was about to graduate or leave. This meant that my fellow exchange students and I gathered with the others. We were prayed over and then many hugs were exchanged as pictures were taken.

I admit, my eyes grew misty as we prayed together and I hugged all of my wonderful brothers and sisters who I have grown so fond of this semester. I have never been part of a community quite as close and uplifting as the one here in I-House. Over the past few months my every need has been taken care of through God working amongst this fellowship of people from every corner of the globe. Even though my sojourn here has been so short, I feel like I was welcomed into a big family.

I have learned so much from these people and grown in so many ways. Every shared meal, shared difficulties; every conversation or time of laughter, the prayers we exchanged… all of it has been so meaningful to me. I never imagined I would feel this way at the end of my time here. I have been blessed to know some of the brightest, most beautiful and encouraging people I have ever met. I have been so welcomed here at Handong, even though I am an awkward, kind of inept blonde girl who just showed up for one semester.

The end of the semester party filled me with thanksgiving. I am so glad I got to know these people, even though saying goodbye will be so hard. It is all worth it.

After we got back to campus I finished up the evening with even more fun picture taking and conversation. Then I stayed up until three a.m. with some of my very dear girl friends watching a move and then talking into the late night hours.

It was a perfect evening for me. I just hope that the encouragement I felt from that night will help me to endure the hardships of finals! Prayers would be appreciated as I face this difficult upcoming week. Especially pray for my trip home and the rough adjustment I will have once there.

And to all my Handong friends, both international and Korean, I love you guys! Thank you for making this the best semester I’ve yet to experience. You guys are the best.

Thanks for reading! There is still more to come, so check back later if you feel so inclined. Thanks! 

Miscellaneous

There have been a few noteworthy events that occurred over the past couple of weeks, so I will write a little bit about some of them in short, episodic format.

Thanksgiving

November 28^th was my first time to spend Thanksgiving away from home. I honestly kept forgetting that it was a holiday, but every time my friends posted about it on Facebook I did feel a little bit sad not to be at home with my family.

Thursday, however, I was invited to two different Thanksgiving meals. The first one I had to decline because of limited time, but the second one I was able to attend. All of the international faculty get together in their apartment building and have a big dinner. Everyone contributes something, and lots of the professors open up their apartment to host all the people.

As American students we were kindly welcomed into the massive throng that evening. There was a lot of good food, good company, and good conversations. It was really neat to get to know some of the professors better and hear their stories. There are some really amazing people here at Handong. It was also good to celebrate with people from such a wide variety of backgrounds. America was certainly not the only country represented there! I was really touched that they invited us into their big family and showed us such spectacular hospitality. It was a really nice evening.

Bowling

Another fun event last week was the I-House bowling trip! I admit, I was hesitant to go because I have never been good at the game and I have bad memories associated with it. But I promised to go with my friends, so that evening I climbed onto another bus and headed into the city.

I will be honest, Korean bowling shoes are even worse than American ones. But apart from that discomfort, it was a really fun time. I didn’t do half as badly as I thought I would, and had a lot of fun with all the people who came out. 

We even got to taste a little bit of street food after we were done because we missed the bus and had some time to kill. Not sure why they call them fish cakes, because they are more like a noodle, but they were tasty anyway. The outing was another good study break, especially with finals looming on our horizon.

Baptism

One of the most incredible, beautiful things that happened for me recently took place this past Sunday. One of my dearest and best friends here at Handong is my roommate, Noelle. She is from China, and her family is not Christian. But through her university she came to faith in Jesus and accepted Him into her life this past summer.

Throughout this semester, my roommate has become one of the closest friends I’ve had throughout all of high school/college. She is such an inspiration to me. Her heart is so soft and so kind, and she treats everybody with an unending grace. I have learned so much just by watching the way that she lives her life. I am incredibly honoured that God chose to place me in her life. She has patiently bore with me through all my difficulties and all my joys throughout this semester, and I truly treasure all of our long and late conversations, our meals together, our walks, and our shared laughter.

When Noelle was baptized this Sunday my heart was filled to bursting with joy. As I watched my sister take this step in her life, I was struck with the beauty of salvation and the incredibly way God has written everyone’s salvation story. I was also struck by a deep sense of wonder that God allows us to be part of other peoples’ stories. He allowed me to get to know my roommate, and allowed me to be with her as she proclaimed her faith in public. What an incredible honour. Such a good moment of my semester.

Handong is a really wonderful place to be able to take this kind of step, I think. There is such a closely knit family here to support and encourage you. I was really glad to be a part of this meaningful event, and I hope that I won’t stop learning from my fantastic friend Noelle any time soon.

~~~~~

I have not been able to write very much because things have been getting kind of hectic. I had two presentations this week, and group work every night preceding Friday. I have another presentation to go on Monday, and then the grueling process of studying for finals. Prayers would be very much appreciated as I face these tests! I am working on typing up another blog entry about the I-House end of semester celebration, so stay tuned.

As always, thank you for reading!

Culture Night!

November 23^rd the International Student Union held their biggest event of the year: Culture Night. It has a popular reputation at Handong, especially amongst the international students. Even as exchange students we were told about it during our orientation week. What is Culture Night you ask? It is a night to celebrate the cultures represented at this school with singing, dancing, food, and fellowship.

All of the international communities get together fairly early in the semester to begin planning this event under the leadership of the president and other members of the International Student Union.

The event begins with each community serving samples of food from their country to the crowds that show up early enough to get a portion. As you can imagine, figuring out how to cook for hundreds of people can be a challenge.

After the food is gone the main event of the evening begins; meaning, a series of performances from cultures represented here on campus. These performances include dancing, singing, story-telling, and other creative ways to represent and demonstrate the beautiful culture the students from their respective communities come from. When the performances finish, there is a fashion show to exhibit the traditional costumes from all over the world.

This is a skeletal description, so now I’ll flesh it out a bit by talking about my experience with Culture Night.  

Over a month ago we were all asked to start getting together with our countrymen to begin the planning process of what we wanted to perform. That’s when the series of meetings began. Each community would send a leader or representative to the meetings where logistics and guidelines for the event were set out with the help of the international student union, then we would hold another meeting to confer that information to our individual communities so that we could plan our section of the program accordingly.

Once we figured out what we wanted to do, our task was to start practicing! As Americans, we had a difficult task coming up with a traditional dance specific to our country. We decided to do a combination of several popular dances taken from the past century of our history. We also ended up including a short skit based off a popular American movie near the end, but I’ll elaborate upon that later.

Only three out of the seven of us had ever danced before so it was a really interesting and sometimes crazy process trying to choreograph it. But with the help of YouTube, talented members of our group, and a lot of time we figured out a routine. As often as we could we gathered to practice the dance routine and polish it up. I have never danced before in my life so it was traumatizing, exciting, stressful and foreign all at once to me.

While we practiced our dance routine we were also trying to decide on what to cook. After much going back and forth we landed on the all American… pie! Apple and pumpkin. Making pie for a few hundred people or so was a daunting task, but with the combined ingenuity of many minds we were able to calculate how much of the ingredients we would need.

The final two weeks before the actual event were busy. We all had to figure out final logistics, practice as much as possible, make our few props, coordinate with the other communities, and so on.

The Thursday before the big night was when we started the baking process. I spent a couple hours that afternoon peeling and slicing up around 75 apples. The next day, Friday, we had to start actually putting everything together. Almost everyone from the American community helped with the baking, including the wonderful faculty couple who let us use their kitchen and a few other awesome helpers.

With our combined forces we got those miniature pies baked and stored—waiting for the coming day when they would all be eaten.

Saturday dawned and found all the internationals dragging themselves at 10 a.m. to the auditorium for a semi-rehearsal. After that I spent the rest of the afternoon doing some final practices with my group, getting homework done, and preparing myself for the evening.

At around 3 p.m. we gathered again to help set up the food serving area and take care of last minute details. Every detail had to fall into place—lighting, music tracks, our introduction video, entering and exiting, prop storage, etc.

By 5 o’clock we were ready to receive all of campus to taste our food! For the next hour or so we served pies and interacted with the other internationals, the Koreans, and some guests who came from off campus. It was a lot of fun and our pies went pretty fast despite the massive quantity we had made.

America!

I got to try a few small things from the other countries’ tables, but I was mostly serving. At last the time for performances came and everyone settled into the auditorium. We started with some traditional Korean drumming, as well as a traditional Korean dance. A message was given on the theme of the night—Passion of the Nations. The idea behind Culture Night was finding unity amongst the diversity of God’s beautiful world, so we heard some good words upon that subject from our faculty adviser.

As each culture performed I was really impressed by what everyone came up with. There was dancing, singing, and more dancing. Everyone put so much work into their performances! I won’t describe each performance in detail because it would be a lot to try and describe, but I will give a list of the cultures who performed:

South Korea (Hayang)

China

Indonesia

Mekong (Laos, Thailand, Cambodia)

South Asia (Bangladesh, Pakistan, Nepal)

Australia

Nepal

Russia

Mongolia

Myanmar

India

Madagascar

America

Africa

To try and give you at least a brief picture of the variety of beautiful things I got to see and experience, I made a little video blog if you so desire to view it. Sadly, I was not able to video every single one, but at least this can give you an overview. I also wish I could have taken more pictures of everyone else's performances!

By the time it came to our performance, I was honestly getting nervous. Everyone else did such a wonderful job, and here I was—the American who had never danced before, much less in front of a crowd! But as we gathered back stage and said a prayer, I decided to have a good time of it. And you know what, I did. Somehow the moves came to me along with a smile on my face. I had so much fun listening to the crowd laugh at our cheesy, random routine.

We went from doing the Charleston to swing dance, from swing to the twist, from the twist to some disco set to the BG’s “Stayin’ Alive,” then on to Michael Jackson’s “Thriller.” Then we got some 90’ boy band in with the guys of our group doing N’Sync’s “Bye Bye Bye.” This was followed by a modern dance called the jerk based off a popular song by Audio Push. Next, we surprised the audience with a few seconds based off the movie “Titanic.” The boys even made a cardboard ship!

The pictures describe it better than I could. Everyone had a good laugh as Celine Dion’s voice rang out passionately across the auditorium with our guys standing on the long board. I am still not sure what inspired them to include it, but everyone enjoyed it so I guess it worked!

We concluded our 6 minute dance with the Harlem Shake, another modern trend in American culture right now. I hadn’t actually practiced that part, so I winged it. I am so glad that I can say I ended up having a blast performing. We may have been silly, but that was alright. I did not mind. It is not easy for me to overcome insecurity and pride in order to do something like that, but I am glad that I did.

After the last performance from the African community we watched the fashion show, and then our International Student Union president got up on stage to give a few heartfelt words. A lot of division has been occurring on campus this semester as a new university president has been elected. This occasion has met with a lot of protests for many complicated reasons. But even in something small like Culture Night, we were all able to experience unity in a meaningful way. So many people worked hard and so many beautiful relationships were showcased throughout this event that it really was a light for Handong. At least, this was my perception. I was really touched.

We ended with singing the Handong logo song, then a huge group picture of all the students—both international and Korean.

The goal of Culture Night was to bring glory to God and celebrate His diverse world in light of the fact that it is also a united world through Him. I think it achieved that purpose. As pictures, laughter, and conversation followed the end of the event my heart filled to bursting. I was surrounded by so many beautiful people, with beautiful stories, who came together in a beautiful way to make it a memorable evening. I am so glad I spent the time and energy on this event. It meant a lot to me, and reminded me of how blessed I have been this semester. It was refreshing, and so many good memories were made.

Thanks for reading to a long, rambling blog entry! I cannot express very well why I enjoyed this event so much, but I bet that if you had been there you would have felt the same. :-)

Blessings!